Tuesday, February 5, 2013

WHEN A MAN LOVES A WOMAN

The Lyrics of the song "when a man loves a woman" originally done by Percy Sledge in 1966
and covered again by Michael Bolton in 1991, captures the exact scenario of whats happening
with Gift a 37 years old guy. The writer of that song stated that when a man loves a woman
he can't keep his mind on notin else and would trade the world for her. And if she is bad, he
can't see it, because she can do no wrong, as he turns his back on his best friends if they
try to put her down, even when she's playing him for a fool because he's usually the last
one to know, as his loving eyes can never see.

 Gift and Abike has been married for 3 years and are without any kid. Gift came back from work sometime in december (he works for an oil company and spends 2 weeks offshore) to
meet an empty apartment. His wife had parked out of the house prior to his arrival. According to him, there was no quarrel or misunderstanding between them and all had been well and good with them. So you can imagine his shock when he came back and met an empty house.He tried to call her through out that day but her phone was switched off. He was very worried as he had spoken to her the
previous night and she had not told him she was going anywhere. He couldnt sleep that night and went round all her friends place to look for her but no one seem to know her wherabout. The next day she called him to tell him not to bother searching for her because she won't be coming back home as shes no longer interested in the marriage. Gift was so surprised by her behaviour and he asked her
what the problem is? she could not come up with anything tangible, but all she kept saying was that she dosen't want the marriage anymore. Gift got in touch with her uncle, who was like a father to her since she had lost her father when she was young, to find out if he knew what the problem is, but he too was at loss. However, after so much hassles the uncle was able to convince her to come out of her hiding and come see him so they could talk things over. When asked what the problem is...she said she no longer wanted to be married and that she married because all her friends were getting married and not because she really wanted to be married. She advised Gift to move on with his life and let her be. At this point, Gift started pleading with her to change her mind and come back home with him, and when he saw that she was not willing to bulge, he threatened to commit sucide if she dosent come back to him.

However, as far as Gift's friends were concerned. Abike was good riddance to bad rubbish. They told Gift to be happy, she had left on her own accord and should start celeberating because Abike was not exactly the wife material. They told him of all her many escapades when he is not in town, and how she goes around, drinking in different bars, clubbing and sleeping with different men. What kind of married woman would go clubbing everyday dressed in bumper shorts and skimpy clothes, they told him. Two of his friends confirmed how they met her twice in an hotel with a man she claims was her boss. They told him they could not tell him before now because they did not know how he would react to it, so in view of all these they told him to move on with his life, just as she had advise. Gift on the other hand is adamant, saying that in spite of all what he has been told, he still want his wife back. His family has however told him that they would disown him if his wife comes back to his house because they have been telling him of her nefarious activities before now yet he has refused to act on it. They told him it was obvious she was not just ready for marriage and that its even a good thing that she has left.

Right now, Gift is not on speaking terms with his friends and family....he has told everyone
to leave him alone and let him bear his cross himself. Now the question is this....given what Gift knows about his wife, given the fact that she has refused to come back to the house, why is Gift still begging her to come back? Could this be love or is there something we really dont know? Well we may not be able to answer all these questions begging for answers but the truth remains that the man is actually in love and nothing is going to change that. Theres a parable where I come from which says that it is better to give birth to a thief than to give birth to a fool. Well I dont know how true that is, but I am of the opinion that something is terribly wrong somewhere and very soon we will all get to know. Because it's either there's something wrong, or Gift is just plainly been stupid or he has been jazzed. No Naija man in his right senses will watch his wife turn public property up to the extent of parking out of the house and would still be begging her to come back like Gift is doing. This is really a case of when a man loves a woman he can trade the world for her....like Gift is doing right now. And this is exactly what we get when we marry for the wrong reasons. you dont marry a girl because you think shes the most beautiful girl in the world, and as a woman you dont marry when you not just ready to....just because your friends are getting married.

Please send in your comments and let me know what you think. Cheers.